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We interrupt our non-stop coverage of the leeches fighting over Michael Jackson’s will and the planning for his triumphal entry into Valhalla, which interrupted our non-stop coverage of Mark Sanford’s mid-life melt-down, e-mails to Argentina and the responses from "She who wasn’t obeyed," which interrupted our non-stop coverage of videos we can’t verify from Iran but who cares about those people now, to bring you non-stop coverage of Sarah Palin making another phony looney speech in front of some real loons.

We will now show the full 18 minutes of this looneyism, in which you will learn about Seward’s Folly, the Palin family follies, oil companies, gas pipelines, energy independence, and the wonderfulness of John McCain, whose jerky advisers treated her as their own little dress-up doll and then trashed Ms. Palin because they can’t admit that it was McCain’s judgment that was revealed by selecting someone who would make Tina Fey famous and make Katie Couric look smart when everyone thought that was impossible.

In her speech, Gov. Palin announced that she thought being Governor sucks, even though, she assured her citizens, the state of Alaska is a wonderful state to exploit and that’s what she was doing, and we don’t know the half of it yet, but she can serve them better by leaving (how true!) and eating rubber chicken in front of a crowd of really crazy loonies who paid $30,000 to hear her mangle the official language of the United States of America.

The world is now awaiting the next segment in "Palin" to learn if the symbol of America’s intellectual and philosophical collapse can possibly make herself, her party, her country and the media any more ridiculous than they already are.

So, thanks so much for tuning in. Now please watch these commercials about oil and coal companies saving the environment that used to be there before they came, drug companies promoting brand name drugs that haven’t been tested and will still be on the market after 800 people have suffered liver damage or lost their sense of smell, finance crooks offering to steal your house as you die, and these ads that will scare the hell out of you because Obama wants to watch as your doctor examines you.

Happy 4th of July.